Tuesday, January 20, 2015

ModLodge Probs

Welcome to the ModLodge, where it's Christmas all year round! Or until I take down the white, glitter-dusted tree I bought as sort of a joke last year but has since become my favorite decoration.

But Christmas isn't the only event that's gotten off schedule. My wallpapering project has, well...it's hit a wall. And it's not just because the baby only sleeps for 15 minutes at a time (though that's not helping). We're experiencing two problems.

Problem 1: I ordered wallpaper from another dimension 

After finally deciding I don't care about anyone's opinions but my own, I ordered the teal grasscloth wallpaper a few days before Thanksgiving. By December 22nd, it still had not arrived and so I emailed to find out the status. I received this response:

I just spoke with the vendor and they have a new date of the 2nd week of January. I apologize this was not brought to my attention until now. Grasscloth is all imported to the United States by a slow boat from the Orient and unfortunately they just give us estimates on the best guess of how long to arrive. 

That's right. A slow boat from the Orient.

It did finally arrive as promised at the very end of the second week of January, having been delivered to my doorstep, I can only imagine, via rickshaw.

I should now consider this problem solved, but I do worry that if it turns out that I didn't order enough to cover the wall (I am horrible at figuring out correct square footage), it will take another time-sucking voyage to the far east to procure additional rolls.

Problem 2: The stupid wood trim 

One of the features that I love about our house is the natural wood in every room. The hardwood floors, the vaulted ceiling with beams, the paneling on the walls, and the trim along the windows and doors. I'm so glad that over the years and however many owners, no one painted over all of this. Even that jerk who painted every other surface, including the baseboards, yellow.

Unfortunately, though, someone did decide to change out all of the trim in the ModLodge and install white, lightweight, fall aparty trim that matches zero other rooms in the house. You can see in this picture the contrast between the ModLodge doorway, and the one in the background which looks like every other doorway in the house.

I certainly have to fix this at some point. So I'm presented with the following options.

1. Ignore it for now and leave it as it, but risk damaging the wallpaper when we do make the switch to natural wood trim.
2. Paint over the white trim, like someone did on the baseboards that touch the breakfast bar. This, surprisingly, works from a distance but when you really take a good look at it, bleh.

3. Hire a contractor to replace it all. It shouldn't be too expensive, but with me out on maternity leave we aren't exactly making it rain these days.
4. Figure out how to do it myself.

It probably pleases you all greatly to know that I am, however foolishly, leaning toward option #4. If I can figure out how to do this task, I am no longer limited to painting and redecorating to fix up my house. I will be unstoppable! And it will come in handy because we have to replace all of the baseboards and trim eventually. They're all looking pretty beat up.

I just want to pause for a minute here to say that sometimes I feel a little strange getting so particular about the way my house looks. Like I should be happy I have anything at all. I think I'm especially sensitive about this because I've been watching so much HGTV and 70% of their programs revolve around couples bitching their way through every house on the market, acting like they'd rather die than live someplace with brass light fixtures. I have this idea for a new spin on one of these shows where the house hunting couple also brings along Flavio, the 14-year-old Ecuadorian boy I sponsor for $25 a month through Children International. That should really shake things up. "This house has indoor plumbing AND electricity? Sounds perfect. Who needs anything more than that, right Flavio? Uh...in fact, why bother moving at all? The house we have is more than adequate...can we be done now?"

It's honorable to take pride in home ownership. But you know keep it in perspective, people. Perspective.

Anyway, my rolls of wallpaper are just sitting in the box, waiting for me to make up my mind about how to handle the wood trim situation. So please vote on options 1 through 4. Thank you.

1 comment:

  1. While I love the idea of you going all Bob the Builder on the framework, a contractor could probably do it for cheaper after you figure in all of the saws and whatnot you'll need.